How I Overcame Mommy Anger

Plucking a gallon of milk and a quart of creamer from the grocery refrigerator, I turned to find my cart missing. I winced at the frigid items in my hands, realizing my daughters had wheeled the buggy out of my sight. Cutting off a customer in my haste, I crossed aisles six and seven.

No daughters, no buggy.

Agitated, I sprinted past vitamins and meal replacements, toting my cold dairy products.

And then it hit me.

I was getting rattled over a situation I couldn’t control. That single thought triggered a memory of a previous commitment.

A commitment that had nothing to do with time constraints or schedules.

This commitment had everything to do with a life choice I made in early 2016 called Controlling My Temper.

Learn how I overcame mommy anger using Grace Goals - a strategic plan to set and implement godly goals that will help effect change in our lives.


How I Overcame Mommy Anger

A few weeks before making that choice, I experienced a pop-up bout with anger. Anger I’d not encountered since the early child-rearing years. Anger I’d assumed conquered.

It came about in the form of a two-year-old, whom I’ve fondly nicknamed The Tiny Tornado. The Tiny Tornado is my very first grandchild, and he exudes affection, cheerfulness, and orneriness. He pushes boundaries every day of his life, much like his mother did (whom I cursed by saying, “I hope you have one just like you someday.”)

NOTE TO PARENTS: Never say this. You may end up babysitting your grandkids. (Wink.)

Around this time frame, I discovered Grace Goals, and excitedly brainstormed my long list of shelved ambitions. I tossed around ideas like weight loss, blogging growth, and a more dedicated prayer life. In the midst of choosing the ideal goal, I threw a temper tantrum.

Notice I said, “I (the adult) threw a temper tantrum.” All due to my sweet, Tiny Tornado’s own display of attitude.

History threatened to repeat itself, as I realized my anger lie dormant, ready to strike!

Anger possesses many forms and can be disguised as frustration or annoyance. I had stuffed it down and moved on in the absence of tantrums or blatant disobedience.

But anger lay simmering just below the surface.

Reluctantly, I conceded my Grace Goal. Dreams of shedding twenty pounds or sprinting a 5K fizzled in a mental poof of smoke. I needed to conquer my battle with mommy anger – a goal which would promise eternal value.

And so, I bit the bullet, making the commitment to overcome anger God’s way.

What happened next surpassed my wildest imaginations!


“The vast majority of goal setting resources fail to go deep enough on a spiritual level to actually equip us to change. They give us great “how-to” but not enough “carry through”.” ~Arabah Joy, Grace Goals


In Grace Goals, Arabah Joy guides the participant to record Scripture targeting our goals.

I formed a plan for how to win over my temper, put it into practice, and began to conquer my battle with anger.


“God has a path for goal setting and lasting change…and God has a provision too.” ~ Arabah Joy, Grace Goals


And then, God asked me to do something else.

He asked me to start an anger support group for moms.

Heaven knows I never set out to be the anger lady! But, following God’s lead through prayer and trepidation, I formed MTO (Mom Time Out), a Facebook group for moms tired of blowing it with their kids.

One year later, the MTO group numbers nearly three hundred. I’ve written a book on mom anger, developed a 5-day mommy anger makeover kit, and published more guest posts on the subject than you can shake a stick at.

Apparently, I wasn’t alone in my struggle.

I’ve witnessed moms undergo dramatic transformations through these resources. God is gaining ground in the area of anger, and none of it is by accident.

Maybe your goal is to build your business, overcome fear, or follow a life-long dream.

Building my blog and readership was my inner goal. But curbing my anger became my Grace Goal.

In the end, I received both.


5 questions to ask about your 2017 goals

Ask yourself these five questions and do a bit of soul-searching.

1.) What do you want?

2.) How does that relate to your deepest spiritual desire?

3.) What is your deepest spiritual desire?

4.) Are you tired of being double-minded?

5.) Are you ready to know God’s will?


Grace Goals: A Revolutionary Approach to Setting Goals and Achieving Change. Forget the self help and use this scripture based process to set goals and see godly change in your life!


“God promises to pour on sufficient grace for us to say no to poor choices and say YES to the good, noble choice. Always!” ~Arabah Joy, Grace Goals


Grace Goals points to a vision, a plan, and provision to accomplish God’s will! Why not spend time in God’s presence? Follow His lead – He’ll bless you far more than you could imagine!

Before rounding the corner to my kidnapped grocery cart that day, I made a choice. I chose grace over anger.

My grown daughters and I shared a chuckle as I dropped the icy items from my strained hands. All was forgiven as I gestured, “Let’s get out of here”.

Grace Goals. It’s taking a step of faith towards victory!


But He gives more grace. Therefore it says “God opposes the proud, but gives GRACE to the humble.” James 4:6, ESV




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Ruthie Gray is a wife, mom of four, Gigi, and caregiver, living in the sandwich generation and blogging to keep her sanity.  When she’s not snacking on plastic drumsticks with her grandson (The Tiny Tornado), or snuggling his sister (Baby Cakes), you can find her coaching other moms on how to capture joy while raising kids at her blog, . Ruthie is also the author of  Count to Nine; 9 Liberating Steps for Mom Frustration and Anger. You can connect with Ruthie on Facebook.

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